Canyon Memos 2

This was the quickest way to end a series. 

You know I tried to make sure that I was prepared for anything. I reminded myself incessantly that this was never going to work out. That this was just a fun thing. That whatever happened was supposed to happen. 

Then you got to talking a good game. Telling me that I was beautiful and wanted to date me. You thought I was worthwhile enough to be exclusive. You made it seem like there was really something about me that deserved time and attention.

That's been the joke the whole time. I believed that you actually wanted that and felt that. I let it leak in and permeate my brain. 

I know that I have this front that I use to protect myself and I'm not sure if you ever got to see through it. When I feel things, I feel them deeply. The amount of time does not matter. 

Yeah, I felt this deeply. I won't again. I'm giving myself until Thursday to feel sad and then I'm sitting it down and walking away. You couldn't bother wasting another second to actually tell me how you felt until I pried for it. I won't waste another thought, tears or breath either. 

You made me feel valuable until I wasn't valuable to you any longer. 

I had a lot of fun with you. I thought about you a lot. I would absolutely do it again. 

I kinda hope that this eats at you for a little while and you miss me.

Hopefully life will treat you well. Hopefully, you get everything you deserve.